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Dr Guy's Articles In Humor » Page 8
July 9, 2007 by Dr Guy
"Steep Drop in Death Among Diabetic Men"--headline, WebMD.com, June 18 Good news!  Become Diabetic and you may not die! "Google Pushes 100-mpg Car"--headline, CNNMoney.com, June 19 Mine gets over 100mpg when I push it too! "New York City Pays $29,000 for Arresting Topless Woman"--headline, CNN.com, June 18 She must have had some pair of hooters! "Baby Swallows Found Dead"--headline, Union (Grass Valley, Calif.), June 19 Moral: Dont let baby swallow????? "Ga...
July 9, 2007 by Dr Guy
"Steep Drop in Death Among Diabetic Men"--headline, WebMD.com, June 18 Good news!  Become Diabetic and you may not die! "Google Pushes 100-mpg Car"--headline, CNNMoney.com, June 19 Mine gets over 100mpg when I push it too! "New York City Pays $29,000 for Arresting Topless Woman"--headline, CNN.com, June 18 She must have had some pair of hooters! "Baby Swallows Found Dead"--headline, Union (Grass Valley, Calif.), June 19 Moral: Dont let baby swallow????? "Ga...
June 26, 2007 by Dr Guy
"CBS Chief: Rather Comments Were 'Sexist' "--headline, Associated Press, June 12 We'd rather he not comment sexist. "U.S. Grant Winds Up as 2 Ships Gone Awry"--headline, New York Times, June 13 That would be R.E. Lee and J.E.B. Stuart. "Georgia Will Allow Lethal Execution"--headline, Atlanta Journal-Constitution, June 13 So much for the non-lethal executions. "Al Gore Announces Live Earth Turkey"--headline, United Press International, June 13 Still Promoting his ...
June 26, 2007 by Dr Guy
"CBS Chief: Rather Comments Were 'Sexist' "--headline, Associated Press, June 12 We'd rather he not comment sexist. "U.S. Grant Winds Up as 2 Ships Gone Awry"--headline, New York Times, June 13 That would be R.E. Lee and J.E.B. Stuart. "Georgia Will Allow Lethal Execution"--headline, Atlanta Journal-Constitution, June 13 So much for the non-lethal executions. "Al Gore Announces Live Earth Turkey"--headline, United Press International, June 13 Still Promoting his ...
June 21, 2007 by Dr Guy
"Virgin Vows to Help Elephants in Kenya"--headline, Reuters, June 2 Another sacrafice for a good cause. "Bull Run Faces Test"--headline, CNNMoney.com, June 3 It is Manassas!  No wonder they are re-testing it.  Cant even get the name right. "Two jailed after bridge built by blind man collapses" --headline, Reuters, June 11 The builder saw nothing wrong with it. "Health officials looking for two dangerous mosquitoes" --headline, LaCrosse Tribune, June 7 Th...
June 21, 2007 by Dr Guy
"Virgin Vows to Help Elephants in Kenya"--headline, Reuters, June 2 Another sacrafice for a good cause. "Bull Run Faces Test"--headline, CNNMoney.com, June 3 It is Manassas!  No wonder they are re-testing it.  Cant even get the name right. "Two jailed after bridge built by blind man collapses" --headline, Reuters, June 11 The builder saw nothing wrong with it. "Health officials looking for two dangerous mosquitoes" --headline, LaCrosse Tribune, June 7 Th...
June 12, 2007 by Dr Guy
June 12, 2007 by Dr Guy
June 5, 2007 by Dr Guy
"Wild Potatoes, Peanuts at Risk From Global Warming"--headline, Reuters, May 22 Snoopy and Mrs. Potato head got sunburned. "Minister Accused of Having 8 Wives in Jail"--headline, WGCL-TV Web site (Atlanta), May 21 He knows how to find the crooked ladies! "Officials: Body is Missing Constable"--headline, Associated Press, May 21 At least the police are ahead of the game. "Paula Abdul Misses Dog, Breaks Nose"--headline, CNN.com, May 22 Kind of an extreme form of mo...
June 5, 2007 by Dr Guy
"Wild Potatoes, Peanuts at Risk From Global Warming"--headline, Reuters, May 22 Snoopy and Mrs. Potato head got sunburned. "Minister Accused of Having 8 Wives in Jail"--headline, WGCL-TV Web site (Atlanta), May 21 He knows how to find the crooked ladies! "Officials: Body is Missing Constable"--headline, Associated Press, May 21 At least the police are ahead of the game. "Paula Abdul Misses Dog, Breaks Nose"--headline, CNN.com, May 22 Kind of an extreme form of mo...
May 29, 2007 by Dr Guy
"SUV crashes into store, perhaps in attempt to steal guns" --headline, Orlando Sentinel, May 21 Police looking for SUV - considered Armed and Dangerous! "Hunter Struggles to Be Noticed on GOP Debate Stage"--headline, San Diego Union-Tribune, May 17 He should do what Cheney did - that will get him noticed. "Dementia Training Scheduled for June 1 in Perrysburg"--headline, News-Messenger (Fremont, Ohio), May 17 And for those who forget, June 2, June 3, June 4, ........ "Go...
May 29, 2007 by Dr Guy
"SUV crashes into store, perhaps in attempt to steal guns" --headline, Orlando Sentinel, May 21 Police looking for SUV - considered Armed and Dangerous! "Hunter Struggles to Be Noticed on GOP Debate Stage"--headline, San Diego Union-Tribune, May 17 He should do what Cheney did - that will get him noticed. "Dementia Training Scheduled for June 1 in Perrysburg"--headline, News-Messenger (Fremont, Ohio), May 17 And for those who forget, June 2, June 3, June 4, ........ "Go...
May 21, 2007 by Dr Guy
"Bush Moving on Air Pollution"--headline, Associated Press, May 14 I guess the air is getting thick! "Hillary Stumps Ohio"--headline, NewsMax.com, May 6 And the question is "What state is south of your Border?" "Cloning: Scientists vs. Consumers"--headline, BusinessWeek, May 4 I choose consumers.  They help the economy. "Plan to Move Police Oversight Unit Ripped"--headline, Chicago Sun-Times, May 4 Should have stayed with the Kevlar Units! "Hillary Clinton,...
May 21, 2007 by Dr Guy
"Bush Moving on Air Pollution"--headline, Associated Press, May 14 I guess the air is getting thick! "Hillary Stumps Ohio"--headline, NewsMax.com, May 6 And the question is "What state is south of your Border?" "Cloning: Scientists vs. Consumers"--headline, BusinessWeek, May 4 I choose consumers.  They help the economy. "Plan to Move Police Oversight Unit Ripped"--headline, Chicago Sun-Times, May 4 Should have stayed with the Kevlar Units! "Hillary Clinton,...
May 9, 2007 by Dr Guy
"Left-Handed Women Face Higher Risk of Death"--headline, Daily Telegraph (London), May 2 Greater than 100%???? "Suit: Cop Was Not Fit"--headline, Chicago Sun-Times, May 1 He needed an extra large I bet. "66 Workers at Agency Had Records, Inquiry Finds"--headline, New York Times, May 3 Thre rest had lost their laptops. "Sarkozy, Royal Butt Heads in 'Bad-Tempered' Debate"--headline, Agence France-Presse, May 2 Did the Royal Butt heads win? "Wandering Dog Spray-Pai...