"Experts Say It's Too Hard to Fall Over Accidentally"--headline, Nashua (N.H.) Telegraph, April 10 Gerald Ford never seemed to have a problem. "Study Reveals How Drunken Bats Sober Up"--headline, LiveScience.com, April 10 They look at the man in bed with them. "GM Puts Brakes on New Rear-Wheel Drive Vehicles"--headline, Detroit News, April 12 I am glad I did not buy any rear wheel drive GMs before that! "Armed Man Shot Across Street From CNN Center"--headline, CNN.com, ...
"Experts Say It's Too Hard to Fall Over Accidentally"--headline, Nashua (N.H.) Telegraph, April 10 Gerald Ford never seemed to have a problem. "Study Reveals How Drunken Bats Sober Up"--headline, LiveScience.com, April 10 They look at the man in bed with them. "GM Puts Brakes on New Rear-Wheel Drive Vehicles"--headline, Detroit News, April 12 I am glad I did not buy any rear wheel drive GMs before that! "Armed Man Shot Across Street From CNN Center"--headline, CNN.com, ...
"Dangerous Animals Ban Heads for Debate"--headline, Des Moines Register, March 29 Only Tails allowed to talk. "Pet Owners Likely to Get Little in Suits"--headline, Associated Press, April 1 Serves them right for trying to put those little suits on their pets! "WHO Says Organ Demand Outstrips Supply"--headline, Associated Press, April 30 Probably all the people waiting for an organ. A 2fer: "Swedish Couple Fights for Right to Name Their Baby 'Metallica' "--headline, Ass...
"Dangerous Animals Ban Heads for Debate"--headline, Des Moines Register, March 29 Only Tails allowed to talk. "Pet Owners Likely to Get Little in Suits"--headline, Associated Press, April 1 Serves them right for trying to put those little suits on their pets! "WHO Says Organ Demand Outstrips Supply"--headline, Associated Press, April 30 Probably all the people waiting for an organ. A 2fer: "Swedish Couple Fights for Right to Name Their Baby 'Metallica' "--headline, Ass...
"Mountain Lion Thought to Be Dead Now Missing"--headline, KUSA-TV Web site (Denver), March 22 Did he get up and walk away? Maybe he was just lion about being dead. "Forces Gather to Arrest the Decline of the Industrial Sector in France"--headline, Financial Times, March 23 The industrial sector of France Surrendered without a fight. "Man Arrested for Robbing Same Store Twice"--headline, WLBT-TV Web site (Jackson, Miss.), March 22 Moral - Only rob each store once to stay o...
"Mountain Lion Thought to Be Dead Now Missing"--headline, KUSA-TV Web site (Denver), March 22 Did he get up and walk away? Maybe he was just lion about being dead. "Forces Gather to Arrest the Decline of the Industrial Sector in France"--headline, Financial Times, March 23 The industrial sector of France Surrendered without a fight. "Man Arrested for Robbing Same Store Twice"--headline, WLBT-TV Web site (Jackson, Miss.), March 22 Moral - Only rob each store once to stay o...
"La. Governor Outraged Over Faulty Pumps"--headline, Associated Press, March 15 She should wear flats. They are better for yoru feet anyway. "Stray Cats Enter Home, Attack Woman, Boy"--headline, Associated Press, March 15 They should have stuck to singing. "Fidel Castro Fit to Run in 2008, Official Says"--headline, FoxNews.com, March 16 Another democrat in the race? "VA Nurse Lists Dead Patient as 'Stable' "--headline, News & Record (Greensboro, N.C.), March ...
"La. Governor Outraged Over Faulty Pumps"--headline, Associated Press, March 15 She should wear flats. They are better for yoru feet anyway. "Stray Cats Enter Home, Attack Woman, Boy"--headline, Associated Press, March 15 They should have stuck to singing. "Fidel Castro Fit to Run in 2008, Official Says"--headline, FoxNews.com, March 16 Another democrat in the race? "VA Nurse Lists Dead Patient as 'Stable' "--headline, News & Record (Greensboro, N.C.), March ...
"Experts: Safeguards Lacking on Cadavers"--headline, Associated Press, March 8 Can't have that! They might hurt themselves. "Property Casualty Insurers Association Tells New Jersey Senate That Boats Are Not Automobiles"--headline, SNLi.com, March 8 Next lesson? "Dick and Jane". "Harvey Milk Sculpture Planned for SF"--headline, Associated Press, March 9 Is that the whey to create a sculpture? "Report: Mayo in Car Stopped by Police"--headline, Charleston (W.Va...
"Experts: Safeguards Lacking on Cadavers"--headline, Associated Press, March 8 Can't have that! They might hurt themselves. "Property Casualty Insurers Association Tells New Jersey Senate That Boats Are Not Automobiles"--headline, SNLi.com, March 8 Next lesson? "Dick and Jane". "Harvey Milk Sculpture Planned for SF"--headline, Associated Press, March 9 Is that the whey to create a sculpture? "Report: Mayo in Car Stopped by Police"--headline, Charleston (W.Va...
"Frank Snowden, Former Howard Dean, Dies"--headline, United Press International, Feb. 28 Howard Dean is not an original? "Honey, Root May Help Staph Infection"--headline, Arizona Republic, Feb. 27 So much for healthy honey! "Snails Save Energy by Re-Using Mucus Trails"--headline, LiveScience.com, March 1 Snail powered Houses next? "Inspector General Says School That Uses Shock Therapy Overcharged"--headline, Associated Press, March 1 "Crank the volts down to just ...
"Frank Snowden, Former Howard Dean, Dies"--headline, United Press International, Feb. 28 Howard Dean is not an original? "Honey, Root May Help Staph Infection"--headline, Arizona Republic, Feb. 27 So much for healthy honey! "Snails Save Energy by Re-Using Mucus Trails"--headline, LiveScience.com, March 1 Snail powered Houses next? "Inspector General Says School That Uses Shock Therapy Overcharged"--headline, Associated Press, March 1 "Crank the volts down to just ...
"Giants Meet to Counter US Power"--headline, Times (London), Feb. 15 What are the Cowboys going to do about it? "Colorado Man Places 3rd in Sled Dog Race"--headline, Rocky Mountain News, Feb. 14 He would probably have done better if he had used dogs. "Monster Exec Wants to Plead Guilty"--headline, Associated Press, Feb. 15 I had one of those. A shame he was not convicted too. "Dole Recalls Cantaloupes"--headline, Associated Press, Feb. 16 Did the viagra help...
"Giants Meet to Counter US Power"--headline, Times (London), Feb. 15 What are the Cowboys going to do about it? "Colorado Man Places 3rd in Sled Dog Race"--headline, Rocky Mountain News, Feb. 14 He would probably have done better if he had used dogs. "Monster Exec Wants to Plead Guilty"--headline, Associated Press, Feb. 15 I had one of those. A shame he was not convicted too. "Dole Recalls Cantaloupes"--headline, Associated Press, Feb. 16 Did the viagra help...
"Hair Salons Raise Stroke Awareness"--headline, Associated Press, Feb. 8 "You brush the hair in a downward stroke, not up into the scalp!" "Elizabeth Tashjian, 94, an Expert on Nuts, Dies"--headline, New York Times, Feb. 4 Sigmund Freud's sister no doubt. "113 Nations Blame Man for Climate Change"--headline, Associated Press, Feb. 1 Find that MAN! "Young Harp Seal Found Shot in Sandwich"--headline, WBZ-TV Web site (Boston), Jan. 31 "I'll have a seal and cheese on ...