"Jobless Programmer Gets Poop on Outsourcing"--headline, Houston Chronicle, April 29

I know people are upset about outsourcing, but to poop on them?

"Hillary Clinton Makes Ohio Stop"--headline, Akron Beacon Journal, May 1

That on par with Atlas Shrugging!  She may not be smart, but she sure is strong!

"Little Room for Sex Offenders"--headline, Orlando Sentinel, April 30

Political Correctness gone wild!  We use to call them jail cells!

"Researchers Locate Lost Fishing Nets"--headline, Associated Press, April 29

I think they have too much time on their hands!

"Nurses Rally For New Contract At Mount Sinai"--headline, NY1.com (New York), April 29

Too Late.  Moses already got it.

"Woodpecker Thought Extinct Rediscovered in Ark."--headline, Arizona Republic, April 29

Noah should have checked it all out before disembarking!

"High Schools Hope Education Is the Answer"--headline, Press Democrat (Santa Rosa, Calif.), May 1

Hopes?  I thought that was their JOB.

Golf club operating "fine" after fire  - Richmond Times Dispatch, May 3, 2005

See how useful those Titanium clubs are?  They dont burn!