Debate, and discuss, just dont Bore me.
Published on December 15, 2007 By Dr Guy In Humor

"Local Man to Reproduce, Sell Texaco Fire Hats"--headline, Grand Rapids (Mich.) Press, Sept. 24

Hermaphrodite!

"New Xerox Products Promise Deep Cuts"--headline, Associated Press, Sept. 24

Are they being sold to the federal government?

"Firefighters Practice on Airplane"--headline, Tallahassee (Fla.) Democrat, Sept. 25

Fire at 30,000 feet!

"Amputated Leg Found in Second-Hand Smoker"--headline, Rocky Mountain News (Denver), Sept. 26

Well, they do claim second hand smoke is hazardous to your health.

"Plants Fall Silent"--headline, Saginaw (Mich.) News, Sept. 25

Silent Spring?

"Too Much, Too Little Sleep Doubles Risk of Death, Study Finds"--headline, FoxNews.com, Sept. 25

People are now 200% likely to die?

"Activists Want Rates on Adjustable-Rate Mortgages Frozen"--headline, Plain Dealer (Cleveland), Sept. 27

Psst!  I think those are called fixed rate mortgages.

"Limits Urged on Time Travelers Must Wait in Planes"--headline, Arizona Republic, Sept. 26

"Only 3 23rd century people allowed off today!"

"Stadium Officials Want to Shoot Down Pigeons Pooping on Fans"--headline, Dayton Daily News, Sept. 28

"You pigeons could not sly your way out of a wet paper bag!"

"Texas Facing Wild Hog Explosion"--headline, Time.com, Sept. 28

Pull The Cork!

"Hookers to Help Sheriff Balance the Books"--headline, Flint (Mich.) Journal, Oct. 4

Gives a whole new meaing to "free Enterprise"!

"Pawtucket Fires Two Dispatchers After Death"--headline, Associated Press, Oct. 3

Memo from Personnel:  No sick time to be taken, even in the event of death.

"Gurley Man Sues City Club for Rough Toss"--headline, Huntsville (Ala.) Times, Oct. 9

Schwarzenegger in Alabama?

"Study Says Balls Boost Abdominal Workouts"--headline, Ann Arbor (Mich.) News, Oct. 9

Sorry ladies, you do not have the equipment.

"Zero of 7 Convicted in Sears Tower Plot" --headline, Foxnes, Dec 14

The Borg have landed.

"Colin Powell to Visit Idaho for Korean Summit"--headline, KTVB-TV Web site (Boise), Oct. 11

Guys just have to get off this kick of not asking directions!

"Hunt for Extra-Terrestrial Life Starts in California"--headline, Agence France-Presse, Oct. 11

Jerry Brown exposed!


Comments
on Dec 15, 2007
??? !!!
on Dec 15, 2007
I guess that covers all of them.
on Dec 17, 2007
I haven't seen these in awhile.


"Plants Fall Silent"--

I guess that answers the question "If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?"


"Limits Urged on Time Travelers Must Wait in Planes"--

What are they doing on planes? I thought they travelled using DeLoreans.


"Activists Want Rates on Adjustable-Rate Mortgages Frozen"--

Those activists think Global Warming is affecting everything.


"Amputated Leg Found in Second-Hand Smoker"--

The guy who lost his leg tried to sue the second hand smoker, but his lawyer told him he didn't have a leg to stand on.

on Dec 17, 2007

What are they doing on planes? I thought they travelled using DeLoreans.

That is so last century.

but his lawyer told him he didn't have a leg to stand on.

*Groan*