Daily Dose of Weird and Whacky Headlines

Published on October 20, 2006 By Dr Guy In Humor

"Defense Contractors Weigh Majority Leader Murtha"--headline, The Hill, Oct. 11

What's a Murtha weigh? About 12 stones.

"Bush to the Rescue as Saints Oust Bucs"--headline, Associated Press, Oct. 8

What happened to seperation of Church and State?

"Ducks to Test Coyotes' Toughness"--headline, East Valley Tribune (Mesa, Ariz.), Oct. 7

"Hey Daffy, Pass the tenderizer. This one is still a little stringy."

"Tigers Agree to Resume Peace Talks"--headline, CNN.com, Oct. 10

Lambs over joyed.

"Bras Will Span Susquehanna River"--headline, Daily Item (Sunbury, Pa.), Oct. 8

They must have some WELL endowed women in Pennsylvania!

"Sunny, Warm Day in Store"--headline, Oregonian Web site (Portland), Oct. 10

Now if we could just get it outside the store, it would be a good day.

"Kids Can Food Drive Aims to Help the Hungry"--headline, KCRA-TV Web site (Sacramento, Calif.), Oct. 11

Guess there were not many hungry if they had to can it.

"Guantanamo Bay Prison Breeding More Extremists, U.K. Says"--headline, Bloomberg, Oct. 12

I did not know they had conjugal visits.

"Wasps Released in La. to Combat Bugs"--headline, Associated Press, Oct. 11

I knew those protestants would come in handy some day.

" 'North Koreans Would Sell Their Mother' "--headline, Chicago Sun-Times, Oct. 13
"Mich. Woman Tries to Sell Mummy on eBay"--headline, Associated Press, Oct. 12

Looks like the North Koreans are too late. The US has already tried it. (Damn imperial Dogs! Trying to steal my idea! - Kim Il Sung)

Scientist: By Year 3000, We'll Be Giants With Brown Skin Living to Age of 120"--headline, New York Sun, Oct. 17

By the year 3000, I will be a lot older than 120!

"Man Stabs Self in Stomach With Toddler in Apartment"--headline, King County (Wash.) Journal (last item), Oct. 13

Now that is one sharp kid!

"Guilford Schools Focus on Failing Students"--headline, News & Record (Greensboro, N.C.), Oct. 16

Tough School! Most pass kids whether they deserve it or not!

"We Need the Guts to Say No to Rice"--headline, Jerusalem Post, Oct. 16

Wheat and Corn making comeback.

"Study Links Hair to Eating Disorders"--headline, Associated Press, Oct. 16

Damn! There goes my new diet fad. Hair ala King.

Comments

jennifer1

on Oct 20, 2006

"Tigers Agree to Resume Peace Talks"--headline, CNN.com, Oct. 10
Lambs over joyed.

We Need the Guts to Say No to Rice"--headline, Jerusalem Post, Oct. 16
Wheat and Corn making comeback.

These two got me!

ddddddddddddkkkkkkkksssssss

on Oct 21, 2006

20 Minds are Better than One
A New Way of Thinking is Influencing the World
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Global- In a world where importance is based on appearance, quality and superlatives- such as income and popularity- an old formula is making its way back into today's society. Even more so, a new way of thinking is changing the world for the better with an effect that multiplies with each passing day. As the old adage goes, "Twenty minds are better then one." With that thought forming, we know how the internet is making the planet more connected in all ways. We possess laptop computers; cell phones, PDA's and high-speed broadband, which all connect us globally to anyone and everyone we want to come in contact with. At this time in life we contain more power then ever to help the world, improve it and capitalize on our abilities.

The online connection is starting to form this- www.20minds.com is the beginning of the allegiance.

Can one man make a difference? Can twenty? Across the globe these questions are being answered with a resounding yes in each major city from Tokyo to Chicago.

It all comes down to grouping, selecting and joining one of the elite "Mastermind" groups, which are quickly filling up with some of the greatest variety of talent ever seen. Each one from a different profession. Each one complementing the others.

The first "Mastermind" group was formed by Napoleon Hill, hundreds of years ago, as an effort to connect some of the top minds on the planet in one setting, underground. It worked. Since then profiles such as Bill Gates, Thomas Edison, and Henry Ford along with numerous Presidents have been part of the "Mastermind" society. Today, Mastermind groups are stepping up the plate in an effort to connect, once again, people with a wide array of talents and ideas to shape our tomorrow. Time is vital.

Forming a website, www.20minds.com , the group is planning on connecting sub-groups in each major city in the world. To create the perfect mix of ideas, people and appreciation, only twenty members will be elected in each city- with one group leader to control the setting. Each group, in turn, will have global connection with all the other groups as a diverse mix of talent and professions. Sharing ideas, sharing solutions.

To lead an elect group of individuals toward one common goal is not an easy task but it is one that is vital to a smooth-running organization. These leaders are needed, these positions need to be filled and the benefit of a global network can be yours at minimal investment. Referrals and personal and professional growth will be an outcome for you with the twenty mind society. Think about it. Select people around the world are making the same move you are contemplating right now. They will be your friend, your alliance.

Are two minds better then one? Are twenty better then two? Is it possible to connect ideas through such a network of idea-filled people that it will change the world? The time is running out before the network is complete and the numbers are sufficient. But the question remains, do you have the mind that will lead the world to a better tomorrow? Do you have what it takes?
###
20minds.com is the complete information and forum search center for the MasterMind society. They are a professional group in a casual setting. With the goal of changing the world through individual abilities, twentyminds is the new wave of advancement today. They connect, globalize and improve.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contact:
www.20minds.com

MasonM

on Oct 21, 2006

Scientist: By Year 3000, We'll Be Giants With Brown Skin Living to Age of 120"--headline, New York Sun, Oct. 17

But who's going to pay attention to old giant brown scientists?

dynamaso

on Oct 23, 2006

"Bras Will Span Susquehanna River"--headline, Daily Item (Sunbury, Pa.), Oct. 8

They must have some WELL endowed women in Pennsylvania!

This one cracked me up...

Dr Guy

on Oct 23, 2006

These two got me!

I am going to hate it when they get another Sec. of State! Going to lose a lot of material then.

Dr Guy

on Oct 23, 2006

(Citizen)ddddddddddddkkkkkkkksssssssOctober 21, 2006 16:15:24

I think you have the wrong article.

Dr Guy

on Oct 23, 2006

But who's going to pay attention to old giant brown scientists?

When everyone is a giant, how can you tell who is a giant? "hey! I am 2 mm taller than you!"......rightthttt.

Dr Guy

on Oct 23, 2006

This one cracked me up...

I still have not figured that one out yet either.

MasonM

on Oct 23, 2006

When everyone is a giant, how can you tell who is a giant? "hey! I am 2 mm taller than you!"......rightthttt.

I don't know, maybe they're saying that just the scientists will be old, brown giants.

Dr Guy

on Oct 23, 2006

I don't know, maybe they're saying that just the scientists will be old, brown giants.

They are not already?

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