"Mad Deer Disease May Spread With Saliva"--headline, Associated Press, Oct. 5

I thought they called that the "Kissing Disease".

"Man Still Critical After Getting Stuck in Tub of Dough"--headline, KGW-TV Web site (Portland, Ore.), Oct. 6

I would be mad if I was stuck in dough too!

"EEOC Moves to Stem Decline in Disabled Workforce"--headline, Washington Post, Oct. 6

Are they going to break some legs?

"Crocs Can Pose a Danger on Escalators"--headline, ABCNews.com, Oct. 5

There are not so hot in elevators either!

"Be Advised, Hemorrhoid Cream Not for the Face"--headline, MSNBC.com, Oct. 5

Must be the group that cannot tell their arse from a hole in the ground.

"Hurricanes may be doomed by dust in the wind" --headline, CNN.com, Oct. 10

Guess Kansas is safe from Hurricanes.

"NASA May Send French Astronaut to Space Station --headline, AOL Oct. 10

Not the moon, but close enough I guess.

"Expert Says to Expect the Unexpected"--headline, Toledo Blade, Oct. 8

Non-experts say dont expect the expected.

"Bucking Norm, Some Relish Big Families"--headline, Associated Press, Oct. 8

Peronaally I only like relish on Hotdogs, not people.

"Underground Movement Catches On in Napa"--headline, Associated Press, Oct. 7

Hmmm...they like earthquakes in Napa?

"Venezuela's Chavez Targets Beer Trucks" --headline, Associated Press, Oct. 11

I heard he had fallen off the wagon.