"Police: Watch for Man Who Exposes Himself"--healdine, WDIV-TV Web site (Detroit), March 6

Isn't that what he wants?

"Make More Money, Berlusconi Tells Poor Italians"--headline, Reuters, March 7

Making more money has worked for the poor every time!

"Hummingbirds Have Superb Memories of Last Meals"--headline, Agence France-Presse, March 7

Does this mean they have a llife after death?

"Free Porn Weekend--Clermont Fellowship Church"--headline, WFTV Web site (Orlando, Fla.),

This is taking fellowship a little too far.

"Bill Aims to Add Teeth to Sex Predator Data"--headline, Bucyrus (Ohio) Telegraph Forum, March 8

Sexual predators are toothless?

"Scientists Discover How to Pass Exams"--headline, Financial Times, March 10

I hope they did this before they became scientists!

"Preliminary results of an autopsy Sunday showed former Yugoslav president Slobodan Milosevic died of a heart, an official of the UN war crimes tribunal said."--Associated Press, March 12

The secreet to ridding the world of despots!  Give them a heart!

"Clinton Quiet About Past Wal-Mart Ties"--headline, Associated Press, March 10

If I got my ties from Wal-Mart, I would not brag about it either!

"Publisher to Buy Newspaper Chain, Then Sell 12 Newspapers"--headline, New York Times, March 13

Boy!  The Times subscription base has gone down hill!